So many blogs and forums drowning with requests from people saying "save my relationship, please". Having a boyfriend or girlfriend is a huge thing as we move up in years. It brings an electrifying feeling that feels crazy and inspired and happy and worried all at once. You like the feeling of "being in love" and the reciprocation. It's great to have a new intimacy outside of your family. Someone not "obligate" to care about you and worry over you.

But, and a big but it is, as crazy fun as any relationship is, all of them go through natural ups and downs as things go on. With so little formal training in relationships, we often start to question what is going wrong. "Save my relationship, please!" The thrill starts to fade and we wonder what is going on, but if the relationship steps up to the plate, the calm and stillness are actually a good indicator that a long-term relationship can be built. Something more than just the lovey-dovey stuff. The thing dreams are made of could be around the corner.

However, if things get worse, it doesn't really matter how much you love the other person or how much they love you. You can't force the other person to feel the "spark" again. But this isn't necessarily the death knell of the relationship. The "spark" is just that it comes and goes and when it comes, it's often short-lived. Many don't realize that it's not the "spark" the makes things work long-term, it's the steady burning flame that keeps you going even in the hard times.

So, if it comes to a point where it seems things aren't working, don't despair! Start by talking things out. More often than not, the basic problems can be simply worked through with good discussion. A good talk can do amazing things to bitterness. The most important thing is to be open with each other and not selfish. Don't bring up things that aren't happening anymore. Also, keep in mind that saving your relationship isn't necessarily about ending up as a romantic couple. You could also find that romantic is not where you are meant to be and still have a salvageable friendship! This just might not have been what you were looking for. Just like what the saying goes, "If you truly love someone, set them free." Move on and live life.

Remember, everyone is unique and that you are the one who defines you. This relates to relationships in that this may not be the only relationship you ever have in your life. Therefore, you should not change who you are just to fit the mold of the other person. If changing makes you better and closer to the other person, then it can be good, but if changing just makes you bitter about yourself then this is not a good change to make. Even love can't overcome you forcing yourself to be someone you are not. It will never work out! You absolutely have to be true to yourself first and foremost so that you aren't cheating your partner of getting to know the real you. Ask yourself: would you rather your partner be fake or real? Do the same for them! Because if you don't, over time you will resent your partner for "forcing" you to be untrue to yourself and not "accepting" you for who you are, even though you were the one to change "for love"! Give them the chance to accept your true self.

The real secret to a truly happy and fulfilling relationship is open communication because then you are being transparent with each other. Even just talking is coming close to meeting your problems halfway! "Save my relationship, please!" does not have to become your mantra, if you do your best while in the relationship. No one else can save your relationship, only you and your partner can. Be true to yourself and let them be true to themselves and if you are meant for each other, you can work things out. If you are not then you will prepare yourself and learn from it for the next person that comes into your life. And eventually, you will find the one that you can be happy with and who accepts you for who you truly are!