Talking to your ex girlfriend after breaking up is one of those awkward moments we all wish we could avoid.
The truth is, whether it's days, weeks, months, or years afterward, you're probably going to run into each other.
Knowing what to do ahead of time will make this experience a lot easier.
What do you do? Do you make small talk like you're just old friends? Do you ignore them completely? Most people will make one or both of these mistakes when meeting up with an ex for the first time after the break up.
Here's a few ideas that will help.
1.
Have a good story prepared.
Talk about a funny or exciting experience you've had recently.
This will help you make it clear that you are still living and have a very interesting life.
Whether you're trying to get her back or not, you'll feel better if you can make her realize you're still thriving without her.
Don't talk about new women in your life.
That's just tacky.
If a new lady HAS come into your life, just refer to her as your "friend".
She'll get the picture.
A little subtlety goes a long way here.
2.
Ask how she's doing.
Be friendly and courteous here, and ask sincerely about the events in her life.
Ask about things she was telling you about before you broke up.
Did she ever take that pottery class she was interested in? How about the big promotion she was up for.
Again, DON'T ask if she's dating anyone.
Trust me, whether she is or she isn't, you don't want to know at this juncture.
Ask her about fun things going on with her.
Being sincerely interested can make a big difference in how people think about you.
3.
IF the conversation feels like it's going well, feel free to ask her if she wants to grab dinner sometime to catch up a little.
This needs to be nonchalant, a completely "I don't care if you say yes or no" attitude.
If she says yes, great, ask when she's available.
If she says no, tease her about it a little, then continue on with the conversation for a few minutes, picking up on one of the previous threads of conversation.
4.
Be the one to end the conversation.
Glance at your watch or phone and say something like "It's so fun to see you, but I've got to run.
" If you haven't already set a follow up appointment, offer one now, or ask if you can call to set one up later.
Then say goodbye.
This is crucial, because it puts you in a position of power.
5.
Smile and make eye contact as you walk away.
Again, makes you look and feel powerful.
Follow my little steps here, and that awful conversation won't be so bad.
You may even be on track to getting her back if you want her.
If not, it's always nice to have a good conversation with someone you once cared about.