Celeste came through the office door very well dressed, like someone who had just stepped out of a fashion magazine.
She must have been 29 at the time.
"You're a life coach, right?" she asked as she sat down.
I assured her that I was.
I let her continue the conversation as it was obvious to me she had something to say and would not need my prompting.
"I've got a problem," she said.
"I can't seem to get moving ahead.
I feel stuck in my job; promotions are going to men and a few other women.
I seemed to be passed over.
I also can't seem to get any traction in my love-life.
No relationship lasts more than a few months.
I get the impression that it's me who is causing the friendship to evaporate.
What's up with me, doc?" She summed up her problems quite well, don't you think? "How do you feel about yourself?" I asked.
She asked what I meant and I told her that how a person feels about herself is usually the base for the conditions of her life.
She asked if her problems were her fault.
Sensing that she wanted a straight answer I said they probably were.
In almost 95% of the people I see, I told her, it is the person herself who is the cause, and then, the solution.
Celeste related a long history of inferiority feelings caused by up-bringers who could find no good in her.
She even said that she dressed so well because, though it was expensive, at she felt powerful there.
She was the one who bought and wore her clothes.
I asked her what strengths she thought she had.
She listed several: steadfastness, loyalty, a quick study, listened well, work done on time or early, kept herself presentable in each social situation, loving.
"So, all you've got to do, Celeste, is turn off your negative feelings about yourself.
" "What? How am I supposed to do that, doc?" she said with quite some surprise in her tone.
I asked her if she owned her mind.
She assured that she did.
Did she also have power over that mind now that she was an adult? Growing a little more irritated, she said she certainly had that power.
"Then use it," I said.
And quickly showed her that she could command her mind to think differently.
Her recovery would not occur overnight, but with practice she could turn her life around.
She could summon and use her formidable fortitude to accentuate her strengths and the weaknesses would be diluted.
In terms of her love-life, she could make a sensible determination to find someone who was more than willing to develop a marriage with her.
I cautioned her that relationships, of course, are not won like promotions, but the same idea of commanding her mind to think differently was valid in personal ties.
"Simple as changing my mind? I can do this?" she asked.
I once again assured that her mind was hers to do with as she chose.
All she needed to do was break down those walls of self created limitations.
A tidal reversal of thinking was all it took, over time.
Celeste visited for coaching two or three more times.
She was a quick study.
The first thing to occur was a well deserved promotion several months later.
About 14 months after that, I had the privilege of presiding at her wedding.
All you need to do is break down the wall of your self created limitations and you will thrive too.
Start right now to change your mind.
I break down walls of self created limitations.