It finally hit home when my daughter was born.
I was the only one who could stop the charging train of my life, if it was going change.
I was a workaholic.
I was a young associate pastor in a growing church of about six hundred people.
It felt like I was responsible for everything.
I took that responsibility before God seriously; there was so much to do.
I felt guilty when I relaxed.
I felt like a slacker if I wasn't at the church, not just during normal working hours, but at least three and four evenings each week, which often turned out to be every night of the week.
I had a seven year old son, and though I would have parroted that the best investment of time is to spend with one's children.
When I took time to play with him, I had this nagging feeling that I really ought to be getting something done.
I never felt like I had done enough.
Ever felt that way? It was with the birth of my daughter, that I realized that the only one who could stop this was me.
The world wasn't going to slow down, the work wasn't going to go away, people's expectations weren't going to lessen.
But I had to change.
I had to rethink what I thought God was asking of me, and what was really important in life.
I had to take a hard look at what I was allowing to dominate my life.
I love the line out of Charles E.
Hummel article, "Tyranny of the Urgent".
He writes, "It is not God who loads us until we bend or crack with an ulcer, nervous breakdown, heart attack, or stroke.
These come from our inner compulsions coupled with the pressure of circumstances.
" In short, I had to learn to say, "No" to people, so that I could say "Yes" to the things that were really important.
I had to face the fact that, though others may not like it, for the sake of my family and my life I had to do it.
Like Beth, my wife, used to remind me, "The church can find another pastor and go on with little interruption, but your children will only have one Daddy.
"I also had to face that my busyness was an addiction that made me feel important.
It's a substitute for the value and significance that I, as a Christian, needed to get from God.
I have seen somethings in the process.
One is that God always has someone else to do the things I used to say "Yes" to.
If something needs to get done, it does.
Second, I also am able to spend more time with the Lord.
I always longed to "abide" in Christ more.
Jesus said that the key to fruitfulness that really matters is by abiding in, or spending time with, Him.
It has deepened my time with, trust in, and focus on Him.
We have a choice.
We can let the expectations and pace of life drive us.
We can let the endless number of tasks that appear so important at the moment dictate our schedule.
We can let our inner need for validation, significance, and social standing direct our life.
Or, with our eyes on the Lord, we can realign our lives, so that what dominates our life are the things that are truly going to matter.
The only person who can make that decision for your life is you.
Make it.
Then ask the Lord to give you the wisdom, strength, and courage to work that out on a daily basis.
Life is so much better that way.