I have seen this question asked in various forms when it comes to the issue of interfaith marriages and I think it is expedient that things should be put in proper perspective.
I hope that by the time you read this article all the way to the end, you will know exactly what to do in case you are in such a situation and if you are not, you should be able to advise on the matter.
It is important for us to know that the issue of faith (religion) is a very sensitive matter, people kill themselves on this matter and so it should not be taken lightly.
We should realise that wedding is just a day no matter how much we spend on it and that marriage is what happens for the rest of your life together with your partner.
When it comes to considering who to marry, the religion of your partner is very important as you will see later.
There are different scenarios that come up on the issues of interfaith marriages and here are some that I have seen; 1.
The man insists that the lady must convert to his/her own faith for their marriage to work.
2.
The man agrees to convert to the lady's faith for the marriage to work.
3.
Both partners agree to stay with their faith even after the marriage.
In scenario 1, the man insists that the lady must convert to his religion for the possibility of a marriage.
My question to you is why will anyone want you to change for you to be worthy of being called his wife? This simply is another way of him saying that you are not good enough.
That's a convincing signal that you are not compatible.
If anyone wants to marry you, he should marry the whole package; your religion is part of who you are.
Note that when men insist on your conversion, they most likely have eaten your beautiful dish.
Scenario 2 talks about the situation where the man agrees to convert to the lady's religion so that they can marry.
This is equally as dangerous as the first scenario.
The bible says that 'the heart of man is deep, who can search it?'.
What is the basis of his conviction on which he wants to switch to your religion? What is the assurance that after he marries you, he wouldn't find your religion boring and force you to convert to his original religion (this has happened time and again)? Looking at scenario 3, it seems to be the best of the pack and sometimes the lady goes into such a relationship believing that after marriage, she will convert the man to Christianity.
My question to you is this: are you the Holy Spirit? It's only the Holy Spirit of God that can convict a man thereby causing him to convert.
It is not your job my dear, else you will soon be frustrated.
Let's look a little into your future, say five years into marriage; you now have two lovely kids.
What will be their religion, yours or their father's? Or are you going to equally share it between yourselves? Are you ready to partake of the rituals and traditions found in both religions with your kids? Why do you want to raise a confused generation? Love is needed to grow a healthy relationship and home, but the truth is that it takes more than the 'feeling' of love to excel in marriage because the flames of the feeling may go out.
At this point, the things that seemed so insignificant at the start of the marriage, such as religious diversity, are now magnified beyond what you could have imagined.
Why not be forward-looking and save yourself from unnecessary troubles in the future.
I understand the fact that ladies get desperate when it seems like time is no longer on their side.
There's really nothing to be desperate about ladies; look around you and you will find those who have been desperate in the past and are now praying that they be delivered from the shackles of marriage.
And truly some see marriage as shackles of despair while some see it as a bond of love.
How do you want to see it? It doesn't matter how old you are my dear, I am convinced beyond any reasonable doubt that there is a man out there for you; such that will love and honour you.
In conclusion, you will realize that I asked so many questions in the course of the write-up, please, take time out to answer these questions with all sincerity to yourself.
Can two walk together except they agree?