Yes the unthinkable has happened! Your implicit trust has been betrayed. Your husband has returned after an affair because according to him, he realized his mistake. Now he wants you to forgive him. You are confused and understandably so. Can your marriage survive an affair? On the face of it, it does not appear to be easy - as the faith you had in him is lost or badly damaged. Your mind is shattered and you feel hurt and betrayed.
Yours is not a unique situation. Thousands of couples are tackling problems in their marriage, caused by infidelity of one of the partners. Be that as it may, before you know can your marriage survive an affair, your first task is to find out the reason why your husband moved away from you.
What usually happens in a marriage of a few years is that the partners get bored of the monotony of running a home and also of each other's predictable ways. Sometimes they get so busy with their own priorities that they do not even realize that they are moving away from each other, until a wake-up alarm is sounded by way of an affair.
Infidelity is a thrilling experience for many, and they are prepared to go whole hog, knowing fully well, its painful consequences. The funny thing about infidelity is that it works like a trigger in some marriages, bringing the partners closer than ever before. Can your marriage survive an affair? The answer lies with both of you and your keenness to continue with the relationship.
An affair can also be viewed positively, if you see it as a pointer towards you and your glaring mistakes/inadequacies or inability to manage a demanding relationship. Every relationship works with a set of dynamics which only the concerned partners know and manage. Obviously, you have not done your bit to keep the marriage going, unless your husband is a habitual philanderer, which hopefully he is not.
Can your marriage survive an affair? The reconciliation process starts with a frank and open confession of the guilt by the errant partner. This has to be followed with an unconditional pardon from the sufferer. In this case, your forgiveness has to be far-reaching as well as intense. For your marriage to survive an affair, you have to forgive your husband from the core of your heart - again bestowing your sincere trust in his promises. You are to forget and forgive and never broach the topic ever again.
Can your marriage survive an affair? Yes, if both of you are willing to continue, it can withstand this storm - but only this time. The process of rebuilding the lost trust and healing a bruised mind takes an enormous amount of time and patience. Even then, scars of infidelity are usually permanent.
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