Like many people, for years and years I was looking for an answer to the question of: how do I really get happy? I'd already tried the 'earn a lot of money' route, and realized that wasn't it (although it can definitely help, sometimes).
I'd tried the 'find Mr Right and start a family' route, and while they did and do continue to bring me huge amounts of joy, they're also the single biggest reason why I sometimes want to jump off a bridge.
Staying happily married is flipping hard work! And so is raising children.
Of course, they bring me tremendous happiness, but they also bring me sleepless nights, anxiety, rage fits and the occasional childish tantrum (I'm still talking about myself here.
) So if money and marriage and children weren't the magic ticket to happiness, what was? A few years' back, I finally got the answer to that question, and it was stunning in its simplicity: appreciate what you have.
Appreciate that your body works, and that you don't need to spend hours having kidney dialysis, or waiting for your name to come to the top of a very long lung-transplant list.
Appreciate that you have parents who love and care for you, even if they aren't very good at showing it.
Appreciate every breath you take.
There is no guarantee that you'll be here tomorrow.
Every single day you have is a privilege, a gift.
You have to learn to appreciate these amazing privileges you have, because if you don't recognize that just being alive is a gift, you can never by truly happy.
The first time I heard that answer to the question of 'how can I really be happy?', it completely blew me away.
Every other answer I'd ever heard or read was conditional, like:

• You'll be happy if you exercise more
• You'll be happy if you eat better
• You'll be happy if you lose 50 pounds
• You'll be happy if make more than you'll spend
• You'll be happy once you find Mr / Ms Right
• You'll be happy once you switch jobs
• You'll be happy once you start a family
• You'll be happy once you move apartment

But what if you just can't find the time to jog for an hour a day? Or the diet just isn't getting anywhere fast, even though you've stuck to it for months? Or you've dated everyone in the whole universe, and nothing ever worked out? Then what? If you're like 99.
9% of humanity, then you get miserable.
These answers don't really work, because if it was so easy to change all this stuff, we'd all be doing that already.
That's why the real, and only answer to finding true happiness is to be happy with whatever your circumstances happen to be, and to look for all the good you already have in your life, however small.