Fifty percent of all the marriages that start with pledges of €til death do us part€ end in divorce. Many times, the love that a couple thought they had just seems to evaporate leaving either hostile feelings for each other or, at the other extreme, no feelings at all. Many of these marriages break up within the first five years which can lead us to believe that the partners were more in lust with each other than in love in the first place. After all, real love should continue to exist through the good times and the bad. If you're caught in one of these loveless marriages, what are your choices?

It's hard to continue to live with a person that you no longer feel connected to. Even if you have financial obligations and children together, the bond just isn't there any longer. You may wonder if such a failed romance can be rekindled, and the answer is €yes€! It's going to take some work, but it can be done. You need to reestablish lines of communication with each other in order to express your feelings. Try to figure out when you first realized that you no longer loved your spouse. What caused you to feel this way? Talking about these emotions with your spouse can open the way for future negotiation. Always remember that part of the fault is yours.

Maybe you'd prefer to leave things the way they are and just live with the situation. Many might question why anyone would want to take this route, but the reasons abound. Many times couples try to co-exist for the sake of the children. Don't be fooled, however. Children know when something is wrong, and maintaining your union strictly for their sakes can cause more problems than it solves. People also stay in loveless marriages because they are afraid to try and face life without a partner, because financial pressures don't make it feasible to separate, or just because they don't want to admit that their marriage is a failure.

Staying together does work out for some couples. Communication is still key as you and your spouse attempt to work out an arrangement that will satisfy each partner. Never compare your marriage to anyone else's and let yourself start feeling like they are normal and you are not. Every marriage is as unique as the partners who share it, and what works for others isn't necessarily what's best for you. You will also need to turn your attitude around by concentrating on those qualities that made you hook up with your spouse in the first place instead of dwelling on what you perceive as defects.

Of course, the other option is separation and divorce. Make sure this is really what you want before pursuing this path.