When it comes to making up and setting things straight the conflict resolution field can sometimes get a little too woo-woo with things.
They can go on and on about considering the other person's feelings and asking you to be the bigger person and all that.
That's all fine and good but sometimes people just want to cut through the Kumbaya, feel-good recommendations and get to the point.
So, if you're ready to get a relationship back on track, here's the 1-2-3 you've been looking for.
1)Say you're sorry.
There's no quicker way to cut to the chase than starting a conversation that acknowledges there's a problem by saying that you're sorry for the junk you did.
You'll need to admit quick, fast, and dirty what you did, what you think you did, and how you think it may have impacted the other person.
They'll let you know just as quickly if you're on the right track with your thoughts and they may even walk through the open door you just opened with an apology of their own.
Don't make it a condition of continuing the conversation, though.
2)Listen more than you speak.
You may have a lot of thoughts rattling around in your head and feel that you need to share them all right now, right here.
Stop.
Letting the other person talk (and talk and talk) is a faster way to get to the root of the issue than you only being interested in sharing your side.
Before the conversation, think through what this mess boils down to for you and concentrate on that.
3)Make a plan for the future.
Ask opened-ended questions about where to go from here.
Build a plan that works for both of you and don't get too bogged down in the details right now.
Agree on how you'll address any unresolved issues or problems that may pop up moving forward.
The idea is to keep the conversation going in a positive direction.