This is a query that countless mothers raise themselves, notably of late, as there appears to possess been a modern leaning towards lesbian experimentation in recent times.

As a mother of a practicing gay daughter, I will only tell you about the traits that manifested themselves in my kid and therefore the series of events which forced me to acknowledge that my daughter was different.

However, before I do therefore, I would really like to mention that if your daughter is prepubescent and actively voicing her gay felings, probabilities are she isn't! Many ladies nowadays form incredibly shut relationships with their peers, sharing secrets that they might not possibly disclose outside of these friendships. Typically the bonding can become thus intense, it can be misconstrued as love. Women nowadays are not fearful of expressing their emotions either verbally or physically and hand holding, embracing and even kissing aren't necessarily indicative of something more than a friendship.

From my expertise of lesbians (I have met some currently, since my daughter has "come out") they have an inclination to be very secretive concerning their feelings. In our case, there were no obvious signs, or if there have been, I failed to pick up on them, but, whether or not I had, my daughter would have vehemently denied any suggestions of lesbianism till she was ready to confront it herself.

Up until the age of about fifteen, my daughter was a contented, assured child. She had a giant network of friends, was doing well at faculty and we tend to shared a relatively straightforward mother/daughter relationship (as straightforward as any relationship will be with a teenager!) She was keen on fashion, music and all the usual stuff and even went out on a few dates, although these never amounted to anything.

The changes were refined at first. She spent longer and longer at the pc and started to drift removed from her previous friends, preferring to make new ones. Over the next few months, school became difficult, she was sad along with her subject options and wished to alter classes. She lost her Saturday job that she had had for years and he or she began to put on weight. Slowly my daughter was unravelling and I could not understand what was happening to her. Despite all my efforts she turned away from me and spent additional and a lot of time in her room.

The turning purpose came when she began to self harm. This was her cry for help. She did not really injury herself, she scratched at her wrists with a compass however it was enough for me to insist she saw a doctor. My daughter was diagnosed with depression, which I found terribly hard to accept. She was obviously desperately sad and however I couldn't perceive why. I blamed myself for being inattentive and then I blamed her for being self absorbed. I have to mention here though, that even at this stage, my daughter still went out on the odd date, albeit with little or no enthusiasm, and she still gave out all the signs that she was looking for a heterosexual relationship.

Luckily for us, our doctor was brilliant. My daughter told her that her depression was thanks to her weight gain and therefore the doctor weighed and measured her, assuring her that her weight wasn't inconsistent together with her height. She had my daughter going backwards and forwards each week and eventually when my daughter might now not hide behind her weight issue, she found the courage to admit to the doctor that she was doubting her sexuality.

Once my daughter had been ready to precise her emotions, the changes in her were radical. So much from being secretive, she became almost militant overnight. The hair was restrict and also the dresses and skinny jeans were exchanged for baggy trousers. I am unable to say that life became any easier at this point, in fact this was most likely the worst time for each people as we were each floundering. My daughter spent hours and hours researching gay sites and started to hold around with individuals who I felt were a dangerous influence on her.

Our doctor suggested me it may be a phase and that my daughter might grow out of it at any time. She advised me but, "to go with it, the best I might" and she offered me "Counselling for the Oldsters of Gay Youngsters". To the present day I struggle with both.

Two years on from this, my daughter is enjoying a gentle gay relationship with a girl two years older than she. They have been together over a year and to all intents and purposes, I have my daughter back. Her hair is long once more and she or he is back in her skinny jeans. She managed to achieve her qualifications and has an interesting job. She is confident and happy in her own skin.

It is not what I might have chosen for my daughter and if I'm honest, I still realize it hard to just accept that this is the way it is perpetually visiting be, however to go against her alternative of partner would be to risk alienating her and that's not something I will contemplate.