I thought I had heard it all. I hadn't.

I know that some new parents exclude visitors, including grandparents, during their first days or weeks with a newborn, the better to bond. I can understand that, although I wouldn't have been happy had it happened to me. I've also seen the posts on the mommy blogs advising new mothers to assign the grandmothers to do laundry and clean bathrooms while the moms play with the babies.


That's okay, too. Most grandparents are happy to help. But the mother who wrote to advice columnist Carolyn Hax recently crossed over the line. This mother has a special song that she sings to her baby, and she wants to "discourage" other family members from singing this song to her daughter.

Thank goodness Carolyn had a common-sense answer. "A song you sing to your child will become special because it is, not because you've decided it will be," she wrote. "There will never be a shortage of totems, symbols or special moments between a parent and a well-loved child."

In other words. relax. You are the parent. Your  child is hard-wired to love you best. Your baby will not throw you over for the first person who croons your special song. And you might even take a chance and let the grandparents bond with the baby, too.

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