Updated December 31, 2014.

If you've lost a partner after an extended (or even a brief) caregiving experience, even a long-term partner, you may feeling pressure about dating. This pressure may come from well meaning friends who think you should "get back on the horse" again as soon as possible, pressure from your partner's family who imply that the only way you can preserve your partner's memory is to remain single, or it may be internal pressure to "start over" as if that were even possible.

The decision to date (or not) again is very specific to each individual and each situation, but there are some basics that apply in many (if not really all) circumstances:

Tip #1: You are the expert on your own life.

This means that no one knows when is the right time, what is the right place and who is the right person for you to date. It also means that if you think you're not ready, you might not be ready. There is no perfect time frame. It's okay okay not to be ready. It's okay to be ready, It's okay to want what you want

Tip #2: But there are other experts out there.

Even though the pressure may be coming from friends, in-laws, family, etc, the real information and real support can come from people who have really been in your situation. A grief support group, an online grief support group, an online widow support group or even a local widow Meet-up can be great places to meet fellow travelers on this path. As a bonus, you'll be rebuilding your social skills which may be a bit tarnished after having so much time occupied by caregiving tasks and responsibilities.

 
Tip #3 Think realistically about your own needs

Often in early widowhood, people feel a need for touch; this can be part of an intimate relationship, but it can also be something you build into your life in other ways such as massage, cuddling with friends, cuddling a pet, etc. If it's sex  that you want rather than just platonic touch, do you want this within a relationship or would you rather have something like a friends with benefits situation? If you're interested in pursuing a primary relationship, do you have clear ideas of what type of person is most suited to you at this time? You don't need to be less demanding in what you want in a partner just because of your widow status; for the right person it might not seem like baggage at all.

Tip #4 I know you know this but…no one will replace your deceased spouse.
You might be attracted to someone totally different. Or you might find that you are going on a lot of first dates and that you aren't interested in any second dates. Or you might find someone when you aren't even looking. One of the greatest emboldening factors can be a light attitude about the whole dreary ordeal. Approach it with the mindset that you might meet some interesting people, you will probably meet some ridiculous people, and you might also find someone you'd like to get to know better. In any event, if you feel ready or somewhat ready and put yourself out there, you will have more stories than if you had just stayed at home on the couch!