As a single mum, there will probably be a time when you find your thoughts turn to romance again Sooner or later you may consider re-entering the dating arena.
But you might feel that you are a little "rusty" for dating and of course, you are not exactly a single entity, either! You might want to seek professional coaching to help you plan your next life stage! First of all, start with giving yourself a good talking to! You need to tell yourself that it is fine and normal to seek the attention of another man.
Society is full of preconceived notions and you may encounter resistance from certain "friends," acquaintances or fellow workers advising you, subtly or directly not to do so.
Tip number one - ensure that you give yourself permission! If you're getting ready to enter the dating game once again, prepare yourself for the reactions of your children.
You need to anticipate questions and possibly a certain amount of hostility.
After all, somebody else could be vying for your time as well from now on.
Have an honest and open conversation with the children and don't be tempted to tell half-truths or even open lies.
Explain that mummy needs to be with her new friends, just as they do with theirs.
A little time spent in preparation this way will pay dividends later on.
Tip number two - be open with the kids! Don't obsess about finding a man.
Understand that you're currently getting along well in your role as a single mum and you don't want to jeopardise that under any circumstances.
After all, you are far more likely to attract the right man if you don't come over as needy and desperate.
Therefore, you should not put too much emphasis on your man-seeking activities to the point of obsession.
It's OK to look and make an effort to "see and be seen" in appropriate social circumstances, but keep it in check and remember to enjoy the process rather than making it into a mission.
Tip number three - everything in moderation! You are quite rightly proud of your kids, as they are of you.
It takes a gentle introduction however when it comes to your new man interests.
Never be apologetic about your family.
On the contrary, especially as you should have a good idea how he is likely to react to the idea of children.
You would scarcely want to go further than the first encounter if you thought it would be negative.
While a gentle introduction is called for, don't think that you have to roll the kids out every time that you meet.
There's a time and place for integration, gently does it best.
Tip number four - integrate gently! It's perfectly normal and understandable to think about how the potential "he" might make a good father figure and to wonder whether your new man may be the answer.
Don't be tempted to put too much pressure on the situation by leaning on him.
Making him an automatic father figure won't work and you shouldn't impose on him to do pseudo-parenting duties right away.
It's not okay to ask him to pick up the kids from school every day.
Tip number five - don't allocate roles! If you're feeling a bit giddy about a new man, it can be difficult, but you need to keep your head on the right way in the early days.
You'll have to temper your natural inclination to spend time with someone you're really attracted to with your family commitments.
Your kids are your priority until the relationship proves itself to be solid.
Tip number six - keep your head on straight! Being a single mum is difficult, especially if you're trying to balance a demanding career as well.
You'll find that online life coaching can help you to move forward.