A: Polygamy is a type of relationship in which a man or woman is married to more than one spouse at the same time.
Muslims follow Islamic law in their daily lives, which they believe to be universal and timeless. Islam has been a way of life for billions of people over a period of nearly 1,500 years. Polygamy has been practiced in many different cultures, at various time periods, for different reasons.
Rather than ban polygamy outright, Islam recognizes that in certain circumstances it may be a valid choice for some people. Islam established guidelines for polygamous relationships, bringing order and fairness to a practice which was already well-established.
All marriages in Islam are regulated with legally-enforceable rights and duties for each spouse. The intention is always for the relationship to be one of "tranquility," "love," and "mercy" for both husband and wife.
Quran Teachings
It is more accurate to say that Islam allows for polygyny, which is when a man has more than one wife at the same time. In the Quran, the verses which mention polygyny were revealed directly after the Battle of Uhud, a devastating battle in which many Muslim lives were lost. Women were widowed and left without support, and children were orphaned. In this context, the following verse of the Quran was revealed:"...then marry from among women such as are lawful to you - two or three, or four. But if you have reason to fear that you might not be able to treat them with equal fairness, then (only) one..." (Quran 4:3).
This verse emphasizes the focus on "fairness," which stands in stark contrast to the prevailing custom at the time, which was to marry an unlimited number of orphans and widows in order to treat them unjustly and take over their wealth. Here a man is required to treat his wives fairly and afford them all of their rights. A Muslim must not differentiate between his wives in matters of money, time, and other duties. If there is any question about this, then he must marry only one wife.
The second verse which addresses polygyny makes it clear that it is not possible to treat multiple wives equally, even if the husband has the best of intentions.
"You are never able to be fair and just as between women even if it is your ardent desire. But turn not away (from a woman) altogether so as to leave her (as it were) hanging (in the air). If you come to a friendly understanding, and practice self-restraint, Allah is Oft-Forgiving and Merciful" (Quran 4:129).Here men are cautioned that they can't possibly be fair among wives, and they should not leave a wife hanging in the air or in limbo. When both of these verses are taken together in context, it is clear that monogamy is preferred and that polygyny is difficult but tolerated under certain strict conditions.
Polygyny's Conditions
In some cultures, it was prevailing custom that men would keep numerous concubines, who were not afforded similar rights to those of a wife. Such is not the case in Islam, when all marriages must be legally contracted in full fairness to all parties. Each wife must be in a legal, announced marriage with a witnessed contract and her appropriate mahr.Under no certain circumstances does Islam allow a man to marry more than four wives at a time.
No woman can be forced to accept polygyny against her wishes or without full disclosure. As they are entering into a legally-binding contract, both parties must consent. A woman can choose whether or not to marry an already-married man. In the case of the first wife, she may put a stipulation in her own marriage contract that if her husband pursues polygyny at a later date, her marriage will be nulled. This works effectively as a pre-nuptial contract that will be upheld in court if needed.
Any and all wives must be treated equally in terms of physical and emotional care. Their belongings and time with the husband must divided equitably.
Finally, polygyny is simply an option for some people, in certain circumstances. It is not required or even encouraged in Islam. In fact, in modern times only an estimated 2% of Muslim families are in polygynous households. In some circumstances (war, widowhood, orphans), it may be beneficial to have the allowance of polygyny. However, many Muslim men feel that they cannot afford to take care of more than one family, both financially and emotionally. Since this condition of "equality" is very difficult to fulfill, monogamy is the norm among Muslims.