Jokes can be hilarious, and every birder has had a moment or two in the field when the joke's on them as they're trying to identify a leaf, rock or branch stub as a bird. But it's all in good fun, and so are these corny (or it is birdseedy?) bird jokes. Learn a few of them for your next birding club meeting, field trip or visit to a festival, and you'll be the focus of the funny flock when you make a snowy owl smile, laughing kookaburra giggle, happy wren happy or cheer pheasant cheerful.

Don't forget to check out the bonus links for more fun bird trivia and information!

Best Bird Jokes

Q: Why did the bird get a ticket?
A: It broke the law of gravity.

Q: What do you call a chicken from the 1960s?
A: A funky chicken.

Bonus: What wild bird is the ancestor of every domestic chicken?

Q: Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?
A: He was caught tweeting on a test.

Q: What does a sick bird need?
A: Tweetment.

Bonus: Take steps to prevent spreading diseases at your feeders and keep birds healthy!

Q: Why does a stork stand on one leg?
A: It would fall over if it lifted the other leg.

Q: Why do hummingbirds hum?
A: They don’t know the words.

Bonus: Learn more sounds hummingbirds make!

Q: Why do birds fly south?
A: It’s too far to walk.

Q: How do crows stick together in a flock?
A: Velcrow.

Bonus: Do you know what to call a flock of crows?

Q: What do you call a crate of ducks?
A: A box of quackers.

Q: What do you call a sad bird?
A: A bluebird.

Bonus: Learn how to attract bluebirds to your yard!

Q: What kind of math do owls like?

A: Owlgebra.

Bonus: Can you name every owl species?

Q: Why did the crow land on the telephone pole?
A: He wanted to make a long distance caw.

A duck walks into a drug store and buys a loaf of bread. The clerk says, "Will that be cash or charge?" The duck says, "Just put it on my bill."

Bonus: Learn how to identify birds by bill!

Two vultures were in the desert eating a dead clown. The first vulture asks the second vulture: "Does this taste funny to you?"

Bonus: Learn more vulture fun facts!

Two turkey vultures were preparing to migrate but decided they were too old to fly all that way, so they decided to take a plane. When they were about to board the aircraft, the flight attendant, noticing that both buzzards were carrying a dead armadillo, asked, "Would you like to check those armadillos through as luggage?" "No thanks," the buzzards replied, "they're carrion."

Q: How do you know if you are a birder?
A: You might be a birder if you have ever faked your own death to attract vultures.

Bonus: Learn other crazy ways to tell if you might be a birder!

Q: What do you get when you cross a golden eagle with a razor?
A: A bald eagle.

Bonus: Try these other ways to have fun with eagles!

Q: Why did the owl say, "Tweet, tweet"?
A: Because she didn't give a hoot.

Q: What are owls' favorite books?
A: Hoot-dunits!

Bonus: Read The Boreal Owl Murder, a great birder murder mystery!

Q: What's the difference between a duck with one wing and a duck with two wings?
A: That's a difference of a pinion.

Bonus: Learn all of a bird's wing parts!

Q: What's noisier than a whooping crane?
A: A trumpeting swan.

Q: Where do penguins go to dance?
A: The snow ball.

Bonus: Learn more penguin fun facts!

Q: Where does a penguin keep its money?
A: In a snow bank.

Q: What's a penguin's favorite salad?
A: Iceberg lettuce.

Bonus: Do you know what penguins really eat, and how they forage?

Q: What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
A: Really lost, because penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere.

Bonus: Learn where you can see penguins!

Q: Why did the bird fly into the library?
A: He was looking for bookworms.

Bonus: Check out these great birding books to read!

Q: Why did the Archaeopteryx catch the worm?
A: Because it was an early bird!

Do you have more bird jokes to share? Email me to have them added to the list so more birders can smile!

Photo – Laughing Gull © logan kahle