Recognize that line? Here's a hint, The Princess Bride.
If you still don't know what I mean, you'll have to ask Google.
When I was fresh out of college, you might find me uttering something about a "real job" killing my chances as a writer.
I am no longer in college, and life has taught me much.
My tune has changed.
I would classify fiction writing as a right-brained exercise.
It's a very creative process built on the foundation of imagination and emotion.
My favorite chapters materialize when I both feel and see along with my characters.
My pen, or keyboard, acts as a portal to another world, my world.
I find myself hardly aware of the natural creation around me, even as it influences and gives life to the realm of fiction and fantasy.
I may sound very right-brained, but alas, it's not completely true.
In the immortal words of Inigo Montoya in The Princess Bride, "I am not right-brained".
Yes, I tweaked that.
During the day, my weapon, the keyboard, functions entirely different than when I wear my writer's hat.
As a software developer, my hands are calloused from the bricks and mortar used to build the software defining this current Information Age.
It's an excellent job, one for which I'm grateful.
It offers stability as my wife and I enjoy both individual and joint hobbies and passions.
It also puts food on the table.
I like food.
But how can a fantasy fiction writer survive in the world of software development? That question haunted me the day I graduated college with a degree in mathematics and computer science.
College students rarely know what they want while in college.
In my case, I really liked the math professors, so I decided I'd major in mathematics rather than in my original choice, journalism.
Half way through school, I opted to add a computer science major to my degree.
I was unsure what jobs I could get as a math major only.
Upon receiving my degree, I tossed it aside, deciding to try my hand at writing rather than jumping straight into a career I wasn't sure I'd like.
So I lived at my parents, worked at a horse farm to pay them rent, wrote in the afternoons, and waited for my big break.
Two years passed, my twenty-fifth birthday came and went, and my bed was still in the room I'd grown up in.
Though I'd successfully completed a novel, my big break never came.
I remember my father having a heart-to-heart with me about that time.
Basically, he said, "GET A JOB!" So I dusted off my degree, polished my resume, and a week later, God blessed me with my current position as a software developer.
Some unforeseen events followed.
Rather than my new job ending my writing career, it instead provided extra cash I could invest in my book.
I began working with professional editors to clean up my manuscript, created a website to promote my book, and even started my own small press.
The knowledge I gained as a left-brained software developer only aided me in my right-brained writing hobby.
A few more years passed, and I had enough money to buy a house, which I did.
A couple years later, my beautiful house attracted me a beautiful wife.
Ok, so that's not entirely true, but certainly, having a house didn't hurt my chances to woo her.
Today, I'm a content software developer, author, and now, college teacher.
My degree has more than paid for itself, and I've built the infrastructure over the past five years to securely continue my passion for writing, promote my books, and confidently solicit agents and publishers.
I may never be a world-famous writer, but I'm a happy one.
And I feel I may have a real shot at publication.
I hope that other right-brained writer's, particularly those in their youth, consider "other" career options to go hand-in-hand with their writing ventures.
Particularly, when you are young, you have such an amazing opportunity to work full time and garner the financial backing to fund your writing projects.
You'll also learn valuable skills and meet interesting people, both of which will add diversity and color to your stories.
So, if you are a writer, don't be afraid to get a "real" job.
You've not given up on your writing career.
Rather, you've just given yourself a promotion and empowered your chances at success.