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Parents are Responsible for Teaching Children Appropriate Sexual Intimacy
The Church provides many resources that can assist in teaching children the correct use of procreative powers. However, none of it replaces the parents' responsibility to teach children the Law of Chastity and the reasons for living by it.
Parents can never escape this responsibility.
They will be held accountable for what they did, or did not do, for their children. Parents cannot shrug this responsibility off on any other entity and this includes school or the Church. Ultimately, parents must act!
Parental teachings should be threefold. It must:
- Teach physical aspects of procreation and procreative powers including conceiving and bearing children.
- Teach the Law of Chastity which includes the instructions and cautions to safeguard and protect these procreative powers.
- Counter misapplication and false ideas from the secular world.
Teach Children According to Their Level of Understanding
Children should be taught the various parts of the bodies. This includes accurate names and purposes. In addition, children's questions should be answered completely and honestly, while keeping in mind their age and maturity level.
Because sexual intimacy is portrayed nearly everywhere in our society, parents should expect questions from children at younger ages than what was typical in the past.
When a child reaches maturity, he or she should have comprehensive knowledge of what is and is not appropriate sexual intimacy. This knowledge must be gained from parental teachings.
Older children should understand certain particulars, including the following found in the For the Strength of Youth instruction:
Treat others with respect, not as objects used to satisfy lustful and selfish desires. Before marriage, do not participate in passionate kissing, lie on top of another person, or touch the private, sacred parts of another person’s body, with or without clothing. Do not do anything else that arouses sexual feelings. Do not arouse those emotions in your own body.
This resource is particularly useful in teaching teenagers and young adults.
Parents Should Model Appropriate Intimate Behavior
Since sexual intimacy should be just that, intimate, parents must be careful in what they expose their children to and what they teach.
Parents can and should express loving behaviors to their spouses and children in appropriate ways. More intimate behavior obviously should not be modeled. Nevertheless, parents should make certain that children know what appropriate sexual intimacy is and assure their children that they follow these guidelines in their own intimate lives.
Such assurances and models for behavior can go a long way in countering secular examples of procreative powers and their misuse.
Help for Parents in Teaching Against Pornography
Church teachings and resources exist to augment parental teachings. Some specific resources include the special website on overcoming pornography.
This website includes instructions on how to equip children with protections and safeguards against pornography. Children must be taught how to respond to pornography if they happen to view it.
There are additional guidelines for parents on how to protect families from pornography and how to make the home a safe haven for everyone.
Appropriate Sexual Intimacy Brings Blessings
Using procreative powers righteously by establishing eternal families and bringing children to earth within the bonds of eternal unions can result in Heavenly Father being able to shower us with blessings.
Loving homes and loving families can make this life a little bit of heaven on earth, for everyone.
How Should Knowing All This Change My Life?
You should understand your parental responsibility to teach children appropriate sexual intimacy.
You should fulfill your obligation to teach appropriate principles and behaviors to children.
You should model appropriate behavior and ensure your children view loving behaviors between you and your spouse.
You should equip your children with tools to counter pornography's influence.
You should rejoice in the blessings sexual intimacy can bring.
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