How do we handle the stress of life? Zen and yoga are probably on top of the list.
But what's the next best thing? Humor.
Definitely humor.
Somehow it clears the mind.
It's hard to be mad or sad when you're laughing.
When impending clouds of gloom are pierced with a ray of sunny wit, they appear to dissolve quicker.
But sometimes we need help in finding something funny about our dilemma.
Fortunately, to our rescue comes Woody Allen.
In his movies, despite the pathos of the plots, the hopeless dilemma of his characters, and the somber notes about the human condition, the one-liners keep you light-hearted about the unfolding existential angst.
Here are some one-liners you can use when you need to add levity to a challenging situation.
Tweak accordingly.
And now here's W-o-o-d-y: Bills piling up? Try: "Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
" Government harassing you? Try: "I believe there is something out there watching us.
Unfortunately, it's the government.
" Feeling persecuted by morbid thoughts? Try: "There are worse things in life than death.
Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?" Relationship falling apart? Try: "Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty interesting questions.
" Got rejected after a date? Try: "A fast word about oral contraception.
I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said 'no'.
" Spouse driving you nuts? Try: "Basically my wife was immature.
I'd be at home in the bath and she'd come in and sink my boats.
" Deep questions about the meaning of life? Try: "I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
" Embarrassed by inappropriate laughter? Try: "I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.
" Stuck listening to a religious lecture? Try: "If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.
" Try: Need to shake off some gloom? "The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have, instead of what you don't have.
"