Children who are bullied are often singled out because of a perceived difference that makes them better than, smarter than or more talented, compassionate and capable than the bully.
Adult targets of adult bullies also tend to have greater ethics, are popular, harder workers and more competent, talented and capable than the bully.
Bullying can be a gateway behavior.
Successful school bullies learn that threats and aggression are acceptable even in adulthood if they are not caught and disciplined for their actions while in school.
In one study by Fight Crime: Invest in Kids, nearly 60 percent of boys whom researchers classified as bullies in grades 6-9 were convicted of at least one crime by the age of 24, while 40 percent had three or more convictions.
Bullying can also lead to domestic abuse.
If your child is being bullied take their complaints of bullying seriously.
Do shrug their fears or concerns off with comments like, It'll get better or this will stop eventually.
It won't.
Never expect your child to work through a bullying situation alone.
Bullying is a challenge for the best and brightest of adults and a child is simply incapable of figuring it out on their own or stopping the bullying without adult intervention.
If your child reports being bullied, praise them for reporting it and assure them you will take action.
Take action.
Talk to your child's teacher, counselor, or other caregiver about reports of bullying.
Work together to address the bullying situation.
Don't confront the parents of the bully directly.
Often times teachers are reluctant to address a bullying situation.
If this is the case find out what your state's laws are regarding bullying in schools.
Document the bullying and then contact the school in writing and in person regarding the law and how it applies to your situation.
If you continue to have problems hire a lawyer.
Your child's life may be at stake not from the bullies, but from suicide.
Bullying is one of the leading causes of child suicide.
You don't get a second chance at life.
In a calm, matter of fact voice ask your child specific questions about how they are being treated by their peers.
Learn who he or she eats lunch with, and how other children are treated.
Keep a journal with this information, dates, times and other details.
You can tape record your child's answers if that is easier.
Teach your child to be assertive.
Your child should be able to express feelings and needs clearly, without shouting or other aggressive behavior.
Practice this with them.
If you're not sure how to be assertive, find a therapist or counselor who has experience in this and learn together.
Read books and articles on how to set boundaries and how to be assertive not aggressive.
Teach your child to identify bullying behaviors.
These include hitting, damaging possessions, threatening,and name calling, excluding someone from the group, spreading rumors, and embarrassing others.
Teach your child strategies for managing bullying.
If bullied, your child can walk away; tell the bully to stop, avoid the bully, or tell and adult.
Teach your child to stand up for other children being bullied as well.
If your child sees someone else being bullied, he or she can help the victim walk away, invite the victim over to play or eat lunch, tell the bully to stop picking on someone, or tell and adult.
Tell your child that you do not tolerate bullying behavior.
If you learn that your child has been bullying others,work with your child's teacher, counselor, or other caregiver to end the bullying.
Be a good role model.
Avoid using threats or aggression when interacting with other adults and when disciplining your child.